#254. The Cooler (2003)

 

 

Prior Viewings: 1

 

Is this a real thing? Do casinos actually hire people with quantifiably bad luck to walk around and ruin players' hot streaks through nothing more than their terrible vibes? Because, if so, I think I may have found my true calling.

 

Well, on second thought, perhaps not. Between the grainy visuals, the melancholic mood, the smooth-yet-downbeat score, and the constant threat of seeing Alec Baldwin break someone's limbs with a baseball bat, The Cooler doesn't exactly glorify this line of work. But the whole thing's so seedy and gritty that the concept at least feels credible to me, and it counter-balances the touches of fantasy extremely well. 

 

It also makes for three incredibly compelling main characters. Shelly has more depth than your typical crime movie antagonist, and both Natalie and Bernie are so jaded and sympathetic that you really root for them as a pair. Plus, as bleak as their story may be, there's more than enough style, personality, energy, and heart for it to simultaneously work as an optimistic little fairy tale about love and redemption.

 

Oh, and the fact that these two are played by Maria Bello (one of the coolest and most underrated actors out there) and William H. Macy doesn't exactly hurt on a likeability level.

 

Grade: A

 

#252. The Morning After (1986)

 

 

As much as I love a slow burn thriller, I can also appreciate one that doesn't waste any time. So the opening scene of The Morning After, in which a hungover woman wakes up next to a murdered body, made a great first impression. Right off the bat, the story's got some personal stakes and narrative urgency, and I immediately found myself on the side of this character who's trying to figure out what the hell happened.

 

After that, though, the movie settles into a more routine and casual presentation. It's kinda disappointing considering where we started, and the mood's rarely as palpable as I'd like from here on out (though at least Sidney Lumet can be counted on to keep things tight), but I was still able to enjoy the workmanlike plotting, the neo-noir atmospherics, and the central relationship's compellingly dubious dynamic.

 

Plus, while some of the character stuff doesn't quite work (there are times where it's genuinely hard to tell whether this woman cares about, or even remembers, her present situation), the attempts at development go over well, and Jane Fonda and Jeff Bridges are so natural and sympathetic in their performances that they mostly manage to overcome the script's tonal and structural inconsistencies.

 

Grade: B+

 

#248. Timecop (1994)

 

 

When you watch the opening scene of this movie, in which a time traveler with futuristic weapons kills five Confederate soldiers and steals their gold, you can't help but feel as though the rest of the script kinda wastes its no-limits premise. Unfortunate as it is, if you're here to see some fights between major historical figures and cops from the future, you're gong to be extremely disappointed.

 

But that's when you need to remember that this is a Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. Like, with all due respect, the ceiling was only ever going to be so high. And, once you adjust your expectations accordingly, I think there's a lot to enjoy here. The story, while not nearly as playfully batshit as it could've been, is still creative and well-structured, the presentation is appropriately lean and grimy, and the supporting cast brings a decent amount of flavour and charisma.

 

Plus, there's the aspect that's always the best part of these sci-fi/action movies, and that's all the futurism/time travel stuff. Even if it predictably results in a thousand plot holes, it gives us some charming sets and designs (I especially love how wrong they were about what cars would look like in 2004), and it ensures a fast pace, which, along with JCVD's patented kicks & splits routine, keeps the action fun and engaging.

 

Grade: B+

 

#245. Appaloosa (2008)

 

 

Appaloosa? Wasn't that the name of the woman from Purple Rain?

 

It's easy to see why this one didn't make bank. 2008 was a year of fast and fun blockbusters, so casual audiences likely weren't interested to see a slow, atmospheric throwback western. I know that's how I felt at the time. But now that I've developed a greater appreciation for westerns (and slower stuff in general), I can say I enjoyed it more than I probably would've as a fifteen-year-old.

 

No, the movie doesn't contribute much to its genre, and no, it doesn't quite have my preferred texture (there's something crisp and clean about the sets and cinematography that scans as false to me), but I think it otherwise generally pulls off the modest goals it sets for itself. The scenery's vast, the conflicts sizzle, and the violence comes fast and lethal, which makes up for the lack of visual legitimacy.

 

And while a few of the performances don't entirely work for me (Jeremy Irons is uncharacteristically benign, and Renée Zellweger looks a bit out of place), the central dynamic between Ed Harris and Viggo Mortensen provides the necessary charisma. I was already aware that these guys had solid chemistry thanks to A History of Violence, but they're finally given the opportunity to shine as a pair here, and they make for a compelling, and cool, tandem.

 

Grade: B

#243. They Drive by Night (1940)

 

 

A.K.A. The Road to Frisco

 

Bit of an interesting structure to this one. The opening half is centered around two brothers who transport goods across the country, avoid loan sharks, and try to work on their home lives. But then, a good chunk of the way through, we're suddenly introduced to a trucking business owner and his wife, the latter of whom basically becomes the main character once she decides to go after one of the brothers. 

 

Much like this wife character, the movie is arguably guilty of wanting to have its cake and eat it too. The pair of storylines don't have a whole lot in common on a character or thematic level (though I guess they both reflect the dangers of this lifestyle), the tone is kind of all over the place, and certain aspects of the story - particularly Bogart's subplot - fall a bit by the wayside.

 

In all honesty, though, I don't really consider this stuff to be actively detrimental. On the contrary, I actually think they keep the energy fresh, the pacing lively, and the plot unpredictable. And between the sharp writing, Raoul Walsh's solid workmanship, and Ida Lupino's compellingly maniacal performance, the movie not only manages to maintain its momentum, but kicks into an even higher gear once we reach the third act.

 

Grade: A-

#239. Something Wild (1986)

 

 

For roughly the first forty-five minutes of this movie, I was having a decent enough time. I liked the rom-com premise, the charming chemistry between Jeff Daniels and Melanie Griffith, and the impulsive spirit, but the experience as a whole wasn't exactly rocking my world, either, and there were moments where I found myself thinking that both the script and the jokes were starting to wear a bit thin.

 

Then Ray Liotta showed up.

 

The second this dude appears on screen, everything shifts. The mood immediately becomes dark and dangerous, the stakes increase exponentially, and I suddenly found myself far more invested in the plot. Even if this change is only here to add some fresh conflict, I was thrilled to go along with it, and I think the fact that Liotta pulled it off while still fitting the manic tone really speaks to his abilities as an actor. 

 

It also, of course, speaks to Jonathan Demme's abilities as a filmmaker. His fearless approach is so consistently energetic and eccentric that I think the moods blend pretty seamlessly. Plus, I'm just a sucker for sudden-yet-smooth left turns in general, and I like my comedies on the darker side to begin with, so I guess it was an easy sell in my case. Makes the journey that much quirkier, that much scarier, and, ultimately, that much more romantic.

 

Grade: A

#235. La Bête Humaine (1938)

 

 

A.K.A. The Human Beast and Judas Was a Woman

 

It's funny: for a movie that literally includes "Human" in the title, La Bête Humaine seems to be equally fascinated by train mechanics. But that's certainly not a complaint; trains are among my favourite movie settings/objects, and they'd be even more common if I had my way. So Jean Renoir definitely got off on the right foot with me by making the entire opening a near-wordless train sequence.

 

After that, we largely settle into a proto-noir (or Re-noir, if you will) story of plotting and guilt, the kind where every major character is a horrible person and where most of them end up even worse than they started. Some elements are a bit underdeveloped for my liking (like Lantier's homicidal outbursts, or Roubaud's descent into jealousy), but the tone makes up for that, with atmosphere so bleak and foreboding that it feels almost profound for 1938.

 

Otherwise, I think the strongest element here is the central relationship between Lantier and Séverine, precisely because the two have such little chemistry. It adds to Lantier's sense of isolation, it raises the question of whether Séverine was actually into him or simply using him (which is kept open-ended by Simone Simon's wonderfully vague performance), and it amplifies the shades of pessimism and fatalism throughout.

 

Grade: A-

 

#229. Miller's Crossing (1990)

 

 

Prior Viewings: 1-2

 

The Coen Brothers are my favourite filmmakers, and have been for quite a long time now. Visually, tonally, stylistically, and even thematically, they simply make the kinds of movies that I want to watch. And while I don't necessarily adore everything they've ever made, the batting average is high enough that you'll more than likely grow tired of my endless praise before long.

 

For that reason, I chose to lead off with Miller's Crossing, which had never been a personal favourite (the dense opening half hour always kept it at arm's length for me). But, lo and behold, it totally clicked for me this time, so I guess that plan backfired. I've come around on the complicated plot and era-specific dialogue, and I'm finally able to see just how rich and moody the whole thing is.

 

Whether we're talking about the costumes, the comically large sets, the beautiful music, the muted cinematography, the wild set pieces, the squib-heavy violence, the dry humour, or the colourful collection of characters and performances (I'm especially partial to Jon Polito and J.E. Freeman, but everyone shines here), it all makes for a compelling drama, a terrific period piece, and a well-constructed slice of pulp.

 

So not only do I now view this as another Joel & Ethan masterpiece, but I can also recognize it as maybe the first instance in which their bizarre tonal aesthetic (namely, mixing serious tension with borderline-slapstick) came together in a way that only they could make work. It's just a flawless bit of filmmaking, and I doubt I'll give it the high hat ever again.

 

Grade: A+

 

#227. The Blue Dahlia (1946)

 

 

This is one of those noirs that has a really solid foundation (an interesting premise, a respectable cast [including a reunion between Alan Ladd and Veronica Lake], an original screenplay by Raymond Chandler himself), but, in my opinion, just a so-so result.

 

Part of that's due to Chandler's hardboiled tone, which I'm frankly not all that crazy about (it always comes off kinda dry and dense to me), but I think it's also a matter of the story and characters not living up to their potential. The mystery lacks intrigue, the plot seems to revolve around a string of increasingly implausible chance encounters, and the final reveal is so rushed and random that I wouldn't be surprised if they made it up on the spot.

 

Still, while these elements make the whole thing feel a bit distant and mechanical, there's enough style throughout that I wouldn't quite call it dull, either. Ladd and Lake provide adequate movie star charisma (especially when they're together, as rare as that is), the colourful mix of supporting characters adds a good deal of flavour, and the sets and costumes mostly get the mood across, even if the cinematography almost never does. Decent genre entry, but it could've been a lot better.

 

Grade: B

#226. Purple Noon (1960)

 

 

A.K.A. Plein Soleil, Delitto in pieno sole, Full Sun, Blazing Sun, Lust for Evil, and Talented Mr. Ripley. This thing has more titles than Michael Jordan.

 

Any time I discover another version of a movie that I'm familiar with, I can't help but compare the two, which I know is unfair. Like, sure, when I pit Purple Noon against The Talented Mr. Ripley, it comes up a bit short (primarily because the opening skips over a lot of important character details, and because the ending is a total Hays-era copout), but, on its own terms, I still think it's an entirely absorbing thriller.

 

For one, I continue to find the Ripley character endlessly fascinating. It's always compelling to see a psychopath do their thing (some of the creepiest moments are the ones where he's practicing being someone else), and Alain Delon brings enough shadiness to keep the guy from becoming likeable or relatable, while also providing the necessary charm to make his lack of consequences believable.

 

He also ties into the overwhelming array of beauty on display here. Between the gorgeous leads, the crisp cinematography (which looks seven or eight years ahead of its time), the sun-soaked scenery, and the smooth, romantic pacing, the movie's got such a cool and classy vibe to it, and it causes the crime stuff to feel that much more striking and jarring.

 

Grade: A-

 

P.S. On the topic of matching identities, I can now see why Jude Law was chosen for the remake. He has the exact same features as Maurice Ronet.

 

#224. The Gentlemen (2019)

 

 

When it comes to the gangster stuff, Guy Ritchie tends to be pretty divisive. And I do get it. Like, if you aren't into the kinds of movies where everyone's a witty, gun-slinging badass, the shtick probably gets old extremely fast. But, as someone who will never tire of post-Tarantino bloodbaths, I have to admit that this speed, tone, and personality is right up my alley.

 

And, sure, you could argue that Ritchie's playing it safe here by revisiting familiar territory, but I find it hard to care when, one, the result is this entertaining, and two, there's enough dignified polish to separate it from the likes of Two Smoking Barrels and Snatch. This change might erase some of the indie grittiness that he's known for, but it makes up for that with some faux-refinement, which juxtaposes the similar subject matter really well.

 

More than anything, though, I just love his sense of style: the cute structuring (I was beginning to worry that there was too much setup going on, but it arguably makes the payoff all the more satisfying), the fluid storytelling, the colourful dialogue, the playful accents, the distinct characters, the fast action, and the winning mix of tension and humour. I don't know what it all adds up to, but I know it's fun as hell.

 

Grade: A

 

P.S. Unless you count Glass Onion, this is actually my first Hugh Grant movie. And my god, what an introduction. Just hearing him say Raymond's name in that cheeky cockney voice delighted me to no end.

 

#222. Law Abiding Citizen (2009)

 

 

Okay, can someone please explain to me why so many action movies from around this time (The Dark Knight, Skyfall, The Avengers, Star Trek Into Darkness) included a reveal that the villain getting caught was actually part of the plan? I'm sorry, but that's far too specific a trend for it to have simply been a coincidence.

 

Anyway, Law Abiding Citizen isn't as good or memorable as most of those other examples, but the premise is strong enough that I was mostly engaged by the cat-and-mouse antics. There's a decent sense of stakes here, the conflict ramps up in a way that builds some adequate momentum, and the tone's so playful and energetic that it mostly manages to pull off both the depraved (you can tell we're also at the tail end of the torture porn era here) and over-the-top elements of the script.

 

It's just a shame that pretty much everything else has a slight "going through the motions" feel to it. As entertaining as this movie generally is, Jamie Foxx's uninspired performance, the dreary presentation, the script's reliance on outdated cliches, and the ending being a total copout (a "fuck the system" theme is only satisfying if you're willing to go all the way with it) keep my reaction from being more enthusiastic.

 

Grade: B

#220. Mulholland Falls (1996)

 

 

More than any other subgenre, I'm willing to forgive a little artificial silliness when it comes to neo-noirs. I don't know if that's because I find these movies a bit artificial and silly to begin with, or because it allows the presentation to be flashy and over-the-top in a way that appeals to me, but when I watch modern actors wear old-timey costumes, smoke cigarettes, and beat people up, I can't help but smile at the excess.

 

It's not always a seamless fit, though, and I'm wondering if that's the case here. Mulholland Falls has a fairly intriguing mystery, a palpable atmosphere, an appealingly grey collection of characters, and an impressive cast, but the story/tone only somewhat works for me, and I think that's because this sheen of indulgent self-awareness may not mesh super well with bleaker and more sincere subject matter. Or maybe I just found the pacing a bit too slow.

 

Whatever the case, I'd still say this one's worth seeing if you're generally a fan of L.A. crime dramas, even if it doesn't reach the level of its influences (though I suppose that's true of basically any movie that borrows from Chinatown, save Roger Rabbit), nor L.A. Confidential, which blew it out of the water and into obscurity the following year.

 

Grade: B

 

P.S. It must suck to act opposite Nick Nolte. Dude spits like a camel.

#205. Scarlet Street (1945)

 

 

I know film noirs are generally quite dark by nature, but this one's downright mean-spirited. Fritz Lang takes us to one of the many ugly corners of New York, and populates it with characters that are despicable, irksome, or pathetic (or some combination of the three), which results in one of those seedy little yarns where you're waiting for, and secretly kind of hoping for, everything to go south.

 

These bleaker elements consistently appealed to me (particularly in the final twenty minutes, which get deliciously psychological), but I do think they might've worked even better if the overall movie had a bit less congestion to it. At various points, especially in the second half, we're still being introduced to new subplots and characters, and they tend to detract more than they add, hurting the overall flow of the story for me.

 

But I suppose that kind of bizarre ambition is part of Lang's appeal, right? Like, all this mayhem going on fits pretty well with his heightened styles and tones, so he mostly gets away with it. Plus, it helps that Edward G. Robinson's here to ground everything with his naive, sad sack performance, where he generates just enough sympathy for the arc to sock you in the mouth four or five times.

 

Grade: B+

 

#198. Freeway (1996)

 

 

Matthew Bright read "Little Red Riding Hood" and thought to himself, "You know what this needs? Prostitution and pedophilia."

 

In fairness, though, I guess Freeway isn't that tonally out of line compared to a lot of older fairy tales. It just feels that way because it's a million times sleazier and trashier. The writing is edgy and in-your-face in the most '90s way imaginable, the high-contrast cinematography ensures that the subject matter remains disgustingly believable, and the performances are so heightened that the characters might as well be cartoons.

 

It all makes for a pretty fresh and fun take on a classic story, and even if the entertainment levels aren't always as consistent as I'd prefer (I think the movie loses some of its juice one we shift from the highway portion to the courtroom/prison stuff), the interesting range of exploitation subgenres keeps things playfully energetic, while also ensuring that the formulaic structure is at least somewhat upended.

 

More than anything, though, I think Reese Witherspoon is what makes the movie so messily enjoyable. I couldn't get enough of her spirited attitude and exaggerated accent, and I kinda wish we got to see this side of her more often.

 

Grade: B+

 

#188. Hollywoodland (2006)

 

 

I'll say this for Hollywoodland: as fictionalized Old Hollywood detective movies from 2006 go, it's certainly better than The Black Dahlia.

 

Granted, that's not saying a whole lot. The latter was almost unwatchable, and the former's still pretty bland. I guess there's some decent atmosphere here and there (even if the saturated cinematography completely kills the immersion), and Affleck and Brody are mostly turning in good performances, but everything else feels uninspired to me, from the hokey genre tropes to the trite stabs at drama.

 

More than anything, though, I think my biggest problem probably comes down to structuring. Like, as much as I can appreciate the attempt to tell two related stories with two different protagonists, this approach results in a mystery that barely scratches the surface of its subject matter from either side. And what we're left with is a pair of underbaked halves instead of a satisfying whole, which ultimately lessens the movie's overall impact.

 

Grade: C+

P.S. Is Ben the first actor to technically play both Batman and Superman in live action?

#183. The Secret Agent (2025)

 

 

The main talking point with this one seems to be its length/pacing/sluggishness. I'll admit that two hours and forty minutes is a trying amount of time to spend on a movie that only intermittently springs to life, especially when much of the meandering feels so shapeless (though the kinetic camerawork, snappy editing, and lively performances help to keep the energy up), but I think I otherwise liked the slow burn. It gave the setting some immersion, the thrills some tension, and the structure a chance to unfold in bizarre and unexpected ways, especially in the third act.

 

There's also a good balance of personal drama and paranoid thriller here (with some cartoonish surrealism thrown in for good measure), which usually kept me invested in the conflicts and characters, gripped by the plot developments, and on edge whenever we did get some action. So even if I don't think the overall movie's quite as consistent or memorable as the two other Best Picture contenders I've watched thus far, the positives regarding scale, rhythm, tone, and political commentary (the bulk of which probably went right over my head) still make it entirely deserving of the nomination in my opinion.

 

Grade: A-

 

#180. The Public Enemy (1931)

 

 

A.K.A. Enemies of the Public, which is such a pointless rearrangement that it kinda reminds me of Sphinx from Mystery Men. "If you want to be The Public Enemy, you must first become Enemies of the Public."

 

Prior Viewings: 1

 

It's sometimes hard to judge such an influential film on its own merits (especially when said film basically set the template for an entire genre), but The Public Enemy is so fast and modest and electric that it still totally works as a straightforward piece of nefarious entertainment - hand-wringing intertitles notwithstanding.

 

And while the story is your typical "rise and fall" gangster arc, the simple and seminal presentation, combined with the energy and creativity on display, elevates it to almost mythic status. William A. Wellman is constantly using the camera to punctuate the mood and intensity of a given scene (which is extra impressive when you consider that most of the action takes place off-screen), and James Cagney is so commanding and dangerous and transcendent that he not only dominates the movie, but foreshadows actors like Brando and Nicholson with his grinning, charismatic menace. Just an all-timer of a performance.

 

Between the acting (and not just Cagney; this whole ensemble's pretty solid), the nimble pacing, and the creeping tone, this has to be one of the more accessible movies of the '30s. You may want to consider watching it with subtitles, though. Thanks to both the heavy accents and the mediocre audio quality, it's sometimes near-impossible to understand what these characters are saying.

 

Grade: A

#170. There Goes the Neighborhood (1992)

 

A.K.A. Paydirt

 

I'm down for any movie with a Mad World-esque scavenger hunt premise, even if the results are often messy and mediocre. So while There Goes the Neighborhood is clearly both of those things, the mere fact that it's about a group of characters who collectively lose their minds over some buried treasure is enough to keep my feelings positive. 

 

The main selling point here is obviously the cast. I don't know how you manage to get Jeff Daniels, Catherine O'Hara, Hector Elizondo, Rhea Perlman, Judith Ivey, Harris Yulin, Jonathan Banks, Dabney Coleman, and Chazz Palminteri together and not score a hit out of it, but this group nevertheless makes the most of a tepid and underdeveloped script, while also keeping things appropriately chaotic.

 

Honestly, maybe too chaotic. Like a lot of zany comedies, this one commits the understandable mistake of having way too much going on at the same time. People speak over one another, everything moves a bit too quickly, and it all starts to feel like overload after a while (especially when you take into account rookie Bill Phillips's clunky and unpolished direction), to the point where very little leaves much of an impression. I had a fun time with the movie, but I can also see why nobody ever talks about it.

 

Grade: B

 

#168. The Departed (2006)

 

 

Prior Viewings: 3-4

 

Ever since this one took home Best Picture and Best Director at the Oscars, you'll occasionally hear talk about how they were both largely legacy wins, and that those accolades probably would've gone elsewhere had Raging Bull and Goodfellas not been snubbed in the past. I myself wasn't immune to this line of thinking: The Departed has never not been enjoyably entertaining to me, but the heavy plotting and admittedly mediocre visual palette always kept it from being a personal favourite.

 

That is, until now. Re-watching the movie for the first time in over a decade, I can finally recognize that "entertaining" was an extreme understatement. This is among the tightest, fastest, angriest, most pulse-pounding, tension-mounting, and neatly-packaged (I love stories that manage to tie up every single loose end) thrillers I've ever seen. The whole thing's overflowing with vitriolic dialogue, dark humour, fluid cinematography, flawless pacing, star performances, and aggressive flip phone action, and I had an absolute blast from beginning to end. 

 

Now, is it Marty's "best" movie? Probably not, but I will say that 1) there's some stiff competition in that regard, 2) that doesn't diminish how masterful and downright fun it is, and 3) it's gotta be among his most rewatchable. Once the credits started rolling on this latest viewing, there was a part of me that wanted to run it back, which is an impulse I rarely get, and one that I haven't truly felt since I started this blog.

 

Grade: A+